When I was about 6 years old and I was still loosing my baby teeth, I sat at school one day playing around with one very loose tooth. Rocking it back and forward in my fleshy gum, until POOF! out it came, covered in blood and bits of flesh. I was astonished, I really was, at how this horrible and disgusting thing had come out of my mouth.
I had the same look of astonishment on my face when they told me I had Crohn’s. It didn’t last long, I pretty much followed that look with a very large bout of crying and panicking.
Sometimes, memories like my tooth, come into my head without a moments notice. Smell and taste memories for me are the strongest – reminding me mostly of my illness and my hospital stays. Certain perfumes take me back to Ward 18 and my isolation room. I can’t even face chips, omelettes or instant mash without reminding me of very bad hospital food.
Other times, its like my brain and mouth aren’t connected. Or there is a time lapse on my mouth and its gets all muddled with words and changes letters around, making what finally comes out to be gibberish. It was laughable at first – some times it still is – but now I am concerned. What is this a side effect from? Will it last? When will I stop being embarrassed about it? :S