Weight down to 8st 6. All Crohn’s symptoms back. Being readmitted to hospital tonight for treatment.

Share:

Today is a bad day. Spent most of last night between my bedroom and the bathroom. Woke up with no stomach pains but dry mouth and a headache. Now, the nausea is here, and my bloody tongue and taste buds are gone. Tomorrow I go to the hospital for my first clinic appointment. I am so damn tired already. I just want this to be over. I want lots of days when I feel okay and normal and good. Its impossible though. My tablets take myself away from that. I know they help, I know they do, but I hate…

Share:

I am having to re train my brain and body to what is ‘normal’ and ‘acceptable’ bowel noises / movements and which ones are – quite frankly – not. The continuous, unrelenting pain; for one. Then the fact that pain almost always wakes me up in a cold sweat. And thirdly, being unable to safety ‘ignore’ it and switch my mind to something else. Learning this whilst alone, with company and at night are frustrating me and consuming all my energy.

Share:

Cancer

My dad told me yesterday, that almost every time I phoned him whilst in hospital last month, he thought I was going to tell him they had found cancer in me. That was what was making me so ill, that is what they couldn’t find for a week, that was the thing that was going to keep me weak and fragile – so unlike I’d ever been – for much much longer. Thankfully, they didn’t find any and won’t find any. I am grateful for that, in its saving grace, but his words will stick with me for a while.…

Share:

Every day is different. I think all I want is some consistency.

Share:

Instagram

1   23
1   10
2   17
10   16
0   30
1   30
0   14
0   3
0   7
0   8
1   21
0   25
2   36
4   35

Looking for Something?