My disease has become very invisible. I am the Queen of multi tasking at work these days. The depression is hidden too. Six people know about my fears. About my anger and my confusion. They know a limited amount of how hard I struggle every day, with one thing or another. I wish I wasn’t so full of feelings, of negitive thoughts.

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legat0: Trying to fight the things we feel, But some hurts never heal.Some ghost are never gone, But we go on, We still go on.

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6 Months..

Today is the 7th of March. A miserable day of rain and wind coupled with some unseasonal blazing sunshine. I am happy. Today I have reached a milestone. I have been living with Crohns Disease for 6 months. And, boy has it been a confusing, frustrating, wonderful time. I know that I will have this disease for the rest of my life, and I’ve sort of made my peace with that, for the most part. I know that at some point, things will get worse; so much worse and I will need surgery, but in these very present, very real…

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GI Clinic – 06.03.12

Checked on my blood test – all fine. Iron is still out the normal boundaries, ‘I’m going to give you the tablets again okay?’ Sure, why not? I didn’t enjoy them the last time around, but let’s give it a whirl, eh? Discussed my general health – slightly redundant, seen as my general health isn’t really what I would use to describe me, or my condition. But at present, everything is okay, so I let it slide. Asked me about my bones, and my bowels and my mind. All fine, just abit loopy, but that is me anyway. Since my…

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Musing..

Is this too much to ask? Does anyone think this already? I want someone to look at me and think ‘Jeez, she’s been through fucking lots and she’s still standing upright and smiling. And she laughs about it too! How? She does all that whilst being in pain most days? She must be one heck of a strong lady. She is a great person to be around.” If this is true, speak up or forever hold your peace.

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