I am using one of the “Get Out of Post Free” cards today. This is a update on me, my life and everything in between. The connection between Bernie and my life is becoming tangible… the fear is returning but the faith is growing stronger within me..
Winter has been horrible for the Hunt family the last couple years. Between health problems of both my own and both sides of my family, we have come to dread the cold winter months and feel as if something is expected to happen. True to recent form, the Theory of Three, is in full swing again in 2012.
I should explain: I believe in the Theory of Three – bad things come in threes – and this was no clearer than last year when I spent three separate admissions in hospital because of my Crohn’s. At the same time, my nan was also admitted and my dad had health problems. I thought it was me causing all this unnecessary grief to my family, and I did the best I could on the final time to get better, and stay that way. It worked, the Humira kicked in and I’ve been fighting strong ever since. Sadly, the same can not be said for my nan and dad; their problems have persisted on a low simmer for most of 2012. So where I was kicking ass, other things were slowly unwinding.
Only now can we see that the theory is back in full swing again. My nan was back in hospital over the weekend with an infection and ended up breaking her thigh bone. My father is due for Gallbladder surgery and my grandmother is lined up for back surgery in two weeks. Three people, all suffering. This year, however, I am not on that list.
It might be selfish to even write about, or indeed feel proud about, but it is not me who is sick this year. I get that I caused alot of pain and unhappiness last year with my flare ups and bouts of depression and resistance to treatments, but I made it through it. I am thankful almost every day – when I go to dwell into it – I’ve gone over a year without a real problem. I have retained some control over my disease.
Most of that is down to the management of my condition by doctors and nurses and medications. For the rest of it, it is about me being sensible and knowing I can not push it too far. I’ve gradually built myself up – in weight, confidence and experience – to know my limits. But I am in no way comparing myself to others, where their pain and conditions have resulted in more interventions, more tests and ultimately more pain through treatment. I know, someday, I will be there too. But I am basking in the positivity of knowing it is in my own grasp to monitor my own health and advocate for it when things turn.