August 2018

August 2018

August; you still hate me

 

Every August seems to be my most dreadful of all the months. Without fail, this happens. And this year, whilst avoid an admission, I’ve still had to battle through.

Stoma wise; despite gaining some weight – some, ha! – my stoma has been really settled. Except for a few days in the middle of the month, I’ve  had a regular change and everything looks and feels okay. Making sure I have enough products has never been my weakness, I am always well stocked up; but making sure everything is used correctly and for the right reasons, is sometimes hard when you have a bad run of loose output and some extra bag changes to throw you off your game. BUT it’s all experience and it’s about learning to cope with it and love my stoma despite its immediate flaws, in the moment.

IBD wise; things seems to have settled down into a nice normal and regular pattern. I’m still experiencing some very strong days of fatigue but rest and whole foods have been helping with that one. I’ve had some more urgency than normal, following my infusion but this has died down to a manageable level – probably once or twice every day or so, which is better than it be continuous like it was. I’ve been able to get into a better routine with my medications – which has helped me sleep better and feel generally better for resting. Also, my half day off at work is helping too; forcing me to actually rest.

Advocacy wise; it’s been a quite month for me. In order to cope with how August usually treats me, I’ve dialled back, proactively, my effects so I am focusing on what is important. And whilst I’d love to dedicate more time to being active online and within the community,I find myself concentrating on me. Living well with my IBD and stoma is more important – at present! – than trying to do too much. My goal is to be consistent.

Life wise; the boyfriend spent two weeks in Switzerland and I’ve been working hard and just keeping my head down. It’s been a mental struggle some days because I am reminded of how I felt last year and the previous year, with alot of memories around surgery and admissions. August isn’t easy for me, and whilst I am have not had a major big issue, I still feel that tug inside. The one that I felt 7 years ago, before admission and I know it’s probably just anxiety and PTSD but it feels very real to me. Talking myself down from that tree is hard, and right now, I am just trying to get on with my daily tasks to keep me focused and motivated.

However, moving is kicking off again this month. The hunt is on and let’s hope it’s not too much of a stressful time for us both.

Here is what I wrote about in August:

Until next time,

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