love, relationships, sex, communication

My Note to You

My boyfriend has never seen or experienced me without my IBD. We met a couple months after I was diagnosed. That is now almost five years ago. It’s been my longest relationship to date and I hope it’s the only one I now have. At the start, my disease was under control and I was able to have some sort of life whilst being ill. We acted like a couple of just normal people, you wouldn’t have known I was chronically ill. I kept him away from my hospital appointments – wanted to be a big girl with her big…



We sat in the car, driving to the hospital. Nothing unusual in that; we often drive to the hospital. But I sat there wondering why he was so okay with taking me there. When did it become so normal for us to be going there because I had an appointment, needed blood taking, was having a medication given or needed to collect something from my IBD team? When did my invisible illness become such a huge unspoken part of our relationship? When we met I was just months in to my diagnosis. He met me on a night out some…


  I’m in this great relationship but I am scared beyond anything else I’ve ever felt. It is future and my present. What if this isn’t right? How do I test him to make sure he will be there when I get sick again? I’m so pathetic and acting so morbid to want to be really Crohnie again and see what he does, how he reacts. I want to see if actions will reflect all of the words he’s spoken. Leap of faith. Because if I need him much more than he needs me, I don’t think I can let it…


“Hello.. (Pt. III)

To continue on from the last post about discussion Crohn’s with your friends, this post shall discuss how to explain Crohn’s when it comes to a relationship. I’ve dated three people since I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease back in September last year. Two have ended, the current one is, well, still current and on going. All three have taught me something about how to deal with a relationship, a man and having Crohn’s Disease. I use initials here to protect them. I met J on New Years – my first official outing as a new Crohnie. It was a…


“Hello.. (Pt. II)

To continue on from my last post about friendships and Crohn’s, this post shall look at discussing Crohn’s with friends; old and new, and how to help acquaintances ‘understand’ your condition. “What exactly is Crohn’s disease?” My friend Gemma asked me, when we first met for coffee, in November last year. I was about a week out of hospital and just about to start Humira. She was the only female friend I had let see me whilst in hospital, the only one to keep bugging me and to keep in contact with me whilst I was gloomy and dull. “It’s…


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